If you don't want real please don't read on.

Back in the day I used to lie, cheat and steal. I had a terrible conscience about it. However, I didn't want to fix the problems I simply covered them up, that was typically easier. Just like a child "hiding" under a blanket so were my life errors, my life mistakes- my screw ups, they were "hidden" under... well I don't even know what they were hidden under, I just thought I hid them.

I will go back so you can understand a little better. Years ago, I began telling little lies to make things better, little lies to hide something. Little lies that quite quickly became large lies, large lies that became my life.

You don't understand, I had to lie, I had a poor white trash life, I had to do something to fit in, something to get ahead, something to be great. So I did, I would steal money and cover it up. Somehow I managed to get away with almost everything. Sure I got caught a few times, my parents and the law. But I had gotten so good at being dishonest that I was able to get out of it. Not to mention I had a good side too, I had a clean side, yes, I was living two lives.

Before I knew I was a regular little con artist. Cheated my way to a high school diploma, cheated my way in couple sales jobs, and cheated my way into business. I was dishonest.

I screwed relationships with family, friends, employers, and most definitely screwed my relationship with my Savior, Jesus Christ. Yes, I was saved the whole time.

I couldn't live with myself, I needed a way out, I needed a blanket, something big enough to cover everything I had done, every lie I had told. Then I found it, beer. Yes, beer and cigarettes became my best friends, I was closer to them than my friends, closer to them than my family. I found comfort in beer, bacardi and whatever other alcohol I got my hands on.

I was a dirty. Then God came and cleaned my up. He took me out of business, took me away from the bad habits, and delivered me from any blankets. At least I thought.

I have wrote to this subject this week. God has been working me over. He has tore my house down. I realized this week that I have still tried to hide some of my life, mainly dirty parts of my past. No, I am not doing anything stupid right now. The only stupid thing I have been doing is hiding or trying to hide some of my past.

Today, they are out. God is in control. You may be wondering what has happened. The answer is that pretty much nothing has happened, God has just brought me on a mental and emotional journey. God is as I wrote earlier this week, tearing my house down.

I have not been strongly tempted by beer or anything for quite a while, this week, that has changed. Satan is attacking me. The good news is that God is my comfort, God is my shelter. God is my blanket. I don't need anything else.

Be encouraged, I was addicted and dishonest for years, I have not gone back, nor will I. God has delivered me. Even in my delivery, there are still temptations, but God is here this time. He has me in His hand. He has given me a way out.